Big Mama

This is the best photo I have for now, thanks to my budding photographer, Addison. I am huge. I am really ready to have this baby now. Only a month to go!! There are so many thoughts as to how this will all work out with me being in the hospital and then home with the boys. It seems that Nate's rotations this month will be taking every bit of the day...and then some. Just when we were hoping that it wouldn't be as demanding. I am sure I will survive somehow... I always do.

My baby went to Preschool!!

Oh I never thought I would be so emotional about Addison going to preschool. I mean, he goes lots of places for Sunday school, babysitting, and all sorts of things, but preschool is just a big step for me. He was so very excited to get to wear his backpack and go to school like Daddy. I cried a little bit when I was getting him ready for this photo...but of course he was too excited to notice. So.. I took him to class and he had no problems playing with the other kids. I went to pick him up and as all the other kids greeted their Moms with hugs and squeezes....Addison comes out with a scowl on his face and gives me a "love" punch in the leg. Oh joy, I felt so loved. Well not really, I felt sort of embarrassed and a bit sad. I was truly excited to see him, and he did not seem to want to return that emotion to me...or so I thought.

After our wonderful reunion... I talked to him about how that isn't really a nice thing to do to Mommies, or anyone for that matter. How that makes me feel sad on the inside ( all that mushy Mom stuff -- with maybe a few tears on my end). I would so much rather have a big hug from him. So, the next time I dropped him off I said " Mommy will be back and I am waiting for my big boy hugs and kisses because I will miss you soooo much." Well, it worked. Turns out he really does love me, because without fail, every single time I pick him up he runs out with a smile on his face and jumps into my arms. He also whispers in my ear " I love you sooo much." I think he just didn't know how to tell me how much he missed me!!

Corn!!

The boys love to help me with the corn. Look at Kaden's intense face and Addison just loves to cheese for the camera!

More Mamas

So I attended a moms group today at my church. It went really well and am glad to have to opportunity to connect with other moms. It is funny though how I have culture shock going back to a larger city with the "business" folk. I now get the comments about how close the boys are in age and even that I am expecting a third child. HA! I laugh because in the 'ville that was commonplace among my Mormon friends. If the boys aren't with me, everyone assumes this is my first child...maybe I do look young after all. At any rate, I don't mind it at all. I love my family and am proud of my fertility!

I am quickly realizing that soon, yet another change will be taking place in our family. Am I ready for the challenge? I hope so. Today I was so tired from being up with heartburn last night, that I got very impatient with Addison. He has decided that naps are now optional, leaving me without one as well. I don't function well without sleep. Needless to say there were raised voices, tears and a few "I'm sorry"s spoken. I can only pray that God will provide the strength and patience when I need it.

Kaden has decided that he is going to use the potty...with or without me. Yes, it isn't my doing. He will go all by himself. I guess it is time to go all out and do underpants. Not my ideal timing, but then again, nothing ever is. In addition to that he has come into his new found independence. Screaming when he wants to be left alone or do something by himself. Sort of grating on a tired mom's ears. I am not sure how many times I have said "Kaden stop screaming" today. Maybe tomorrow I will count:)

So my days are long, but I love the kisses and hugs and snuggles. I love whenever Addison finds a flower(weed) in the yard and runs and gives it to me "because I love you", he says. He longs to be with me, but in his own 3 year old way tries to push me away at the same time. What a struggle! I love when Kaden sucks on his baby fingers and snuggles into my shoulder. I asked him today if he was mocking me - after repeating everything I said- his response "YES!"

My first blog entry

So I finally did it! I have a blog.

Now all I need to do is figure out what to write about. I guess I will figure that out as I go. To start with I will introduce the name of this blog. In life I have learned that no matter what, you can't hold your breath. You might just lose consciousness and let life pass you by. Rather we must persevere and learn to approach every situation as if our attitude actually makes a difference. Only then can we learn to truly enjoy every stage, every moment that is filled with dirty diapers, temper tantrums, and piles of laundry. Have I arrived... NO. But at least by reminding myself of this I can learn to experience the moment rather than hold my breath and wish it away!